Nicole del Cardayre | Staff Writer | College.
The moment where a high school student can no longer rely on their parents to do their laundry or make their lunches. The moment where being an adult becomes real to both parents and their children who are about to embark on the first steps of truly becoming independent from one another. Instead they will have to fend for themselves and learn to sew the holes in their clothing and manage their time efficiently. Or is it? College professors and administrators have recently begun to complain that their students are increasingly less independent than generations before. "These children don't have the confidence they need," said Robert Neuman, a retired associate dean for student academic development at Marquette University. Tara Haelle, former professor at Bradley University, stated that she would receive more emails from parents regarding grade disputes and attendance than from her students themselves. Helicopter parenting has started to affect the independence and mental health of students all throughout the nation. A study in the Journal of Child and Family Studies, found that helicopter parents can increase their students’ risk of developing anxiety disorders and depression. The study discovered that over 89 percent of college counseling centers reported an increase of anxiety disorders in their students. Furthermore, 58 percent of college counseling centers reported an increase in clinical depression and self harm among their students. “Throughout the college process I tried to stay pretty independent and do it on my own. I did end up getting a college counselor to review my applications. However, I researched all the schools on my own and did not seek parental help,” said Eric Swanson, a senior. Technology has given helicopter parents a complete tool set to monitor their child’s every move all throughout their college life. GPS tracking, email, social media, and text messaging all equip parents to stay very involved in their child’s life at college. Kayla Reed, a doctoral candidate at Florida State University, found that often times helicopter parents don’t consult their children when making decisions for them, especially regarding financial affairs. Will Mahar, a senior, reflects about how he enjoyed the space he was given from his parents. “My parents have always been very chill regarding my social life, I get my homework done and would be considered a ‘responsible child.’ Because I have been very independent in high school, my parents did not intervene with my college applications and I am confident they will let me be independent throughout college as well,” said Mahar. To break this trend of dependent students, journalist Arlene Weintraub stated that parents should not make executive decisions for their children. Instead they should help educate them on problem solving techniques and how to manage their time efficiently so they can become independent and successful adults. As well, Maureen Tillman, a psychotherapist, recommends that young teens create their own schedules. This will enable them to figure out how to fit in all of their classes, chores, and activities. “Children need to learn early how to take charge of themselves and complete tasks that they don't want to do,” Tillman said. “Both my kids were very independent in the college process, we raised them to make smart decisions and to think for themselves. They both thrive at what they do because they have an inner drive that moves them towards their goals,” said parent Gary Swanson. Psychiatrist Marcia Sirota suggests that parents encourage their children to follow through with their actions. “The kids need to learn that if something is hard, they have to try harder, and stick with it. That's the only road to real success,” Sirota said. Sirota further suggests that in order for parents to empower their children to make their own decisions, they should ask them guiding questions in place of given answers.